Finding Joy

This time last year I was deeply depressed and dealing with such severe anxiety that I basically couldn’t hold a conversation. Having fallen apart rather spectacularly I took a great deal of time and effort putting myself back together. It was the little things that helped me the most and one of the things I consciously made myself do every day was to Find Joy, usually in nature, all around me. 

As spring progressed and the days got lighter and greener it was easy to find something every day that could bring, if not a smile to my face, at least an acknowledgment that the wheel continued to turn and that things change slowly and so too this would pass. 

By the time winter came around I didn’t have to force myself to notice the joys that nature brings. There was always so much to observe, flowers blooming, leaves falling, alien fungi growing, frost sparkling, soft blankets of fog obscuring the landscape, the stars above me on a crisp, clear night. Whatever it was I took that moment of peace, of pleasure and tucked it away inside. 

And now spring is with us again. The wheel has turned and I survived the storm. Each and every moment of simple beauty, of the natural world showing me that there is so much to see, to observe, so much simple, hidden pleasure to be found, even in the depths of winter or on dull, rainy miserable days like today has built within me a deep, comforting well of knowledge. The knowledge that even if I can barely see how I can continue to put one foot in front of the other there is always something to look forward to. Some new joy to be found. And so I wander the streets and periodically pause and listen to the birds bursting forth with song. I watch the squirrels bounding through the branches above. I stop and gaze at the new leaves unfurling from their winter rest. And I feel refreshed  and rejuvenated and things aren’t all that bad. 

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